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Squidward... i used your clarinet to unclog my toilet! i'm so cold, i can use my nose drippings as chopsticks. squidward, you're steaming. you're like a steamed vegetable, only smarter. you're a man now, spongebob, and it's time you started acting like one. well, it may be stupid, but it's also dumb. we're in squidwards body, no wonder it smells funny in here. nonsense, my vocabulary is infinitely expanding! you can't fool me. i listen to public radio! if i were to die right now in a fiery explosion due to carelessness of a friend... . then it would just be alright. that's it mister! you just lost your brain privileges! plankton: 1% evil, 99% hot gas. don't you dare take the name of texas in vain. oh! i didn't realize it was happy hopping moron day! patrick! your genius is showing! oh my god! a floating shopping list! ahhh! ... pants ripped off. huh? someone call the police, there's a pants thief on the loose can't have dirty garbage! we'd better do what he says... he knows how to grow food. i'm mad. i can't see my forehead. remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets. that's no reason to be ripping people's heads off boy! the boy cries you a sweater of tears... and you kill him. i'll tell you the story of the ugly barnacle. there once was an ugly barnacle. he was so ugly, everybody died. the end. attention all employees! just giving you a heads-up. i'll be conducting a surprise uniform inspection in one hour. whoever doesn't pass gets the boot. spongebob is the only guy i know who can have fun with a jellyfish, for twelve hours! the line for the tunnel of glove is filling up. they don't call me cheeks for nothing. mr. krabs, please. i'll prove i'm a fry cook. ask squidward, he'll vouch for me. do you smell it? that smell. a kind of smelly smell. the smelly smell that smells... smelly..

I'm so cold, i can use my nose drippings as chopsticks. squidward, you're steaming. you're like a steamed vegetable, only smarter. you're a man now, spongebob, and it's time you started acting like one. don't genius live in lamps? we're in squidwards body, no wonder it smells funny in here. moss always points to civilization. see, no one says cool anymore. that's such an old person thing. now we say coral, as in that nose job is so coral. can you give spongebob his brain back, i had to borrow it for the week. nonsense, my vocabulary is infinitely expanding! sponge, i'm a big man. a big, big man! spongebob doesn't have hair. or does he? oh! i didn't realize it was happy hopping moron day! ... pants ripped off. huh? someone call the police, there's a pants thief on the loose don't stand too close to a squirrel, billy. you'll catch its stupid. you're nothing but pure evil! just like the newspaper comics! stupid inflatable pants! now you must develop a taste for free-form jazz it's an alaskan bull worm! either you (a) put the dime in me pants, (b) put the dime in me pants, or (c) put the dime in me pants! i'm mad. i can't see my forehead. remember, licking doorknobs is illegal on other planets. oh, tartar sauce. the line for the tunnel of glove is filling up. you'll never guess what i found in my sock last night. go ahead, guess! but first, i'll need a garden hose and a flatbed truck and i'll need to remove your trousers. go out and get yourself a case of the krabbies. do you smell it? that smell. a kind of smelly smell. the smelly smell that smells... smelly. mr. krabs! the krabby patty is haunted! well, we're both invertebrates, aren't we?.

Squidward... i used your clarinet to unclog my toilet! see, no one says cool anymore. that's such an old person thing. now we say coral, as in that nose job is so coral. can you give spongebob his brain back, i had to borrow it for the week. squidward? squidward! the sky had a baby from my cereal box! can i have everybody's attention? i have to use the bathroom. that's it mister! you just lost your brain privileges! a five letter word for happiness... money. i guess hibernation is the opposite of beauty sleep! insurance is what i need for a crabby patty. try one of those radioactive sludge balls you call food? next, i suppose you'll want me to go square-dancing with patrick! we shall never deny a guest even the most ridiculous request. soap... soap... what is soap? no gary, i don't get colds i get the suds. there once was a man from peru who dreamed he was eating his shoe. he woke with fright in the middle of the night, to find that his dream had come true! i have checks, with little poodles on them. we don't really have these powers! the powers are in the costumes. why else would we wear underwear over our pants? my ice cream! it's alive! aaaahhhhhhh! will you please stop leaving your undergarments on my front lawn? that's no reason to be ripping people's heads off boy! i'll tell you the story of the ugly barnacle. there once was an ugly barnacle. he was so ugly, everybody died. the end. the line for the tunnel of glove is filling up. mr. krabs, please. i'll prove i'm a fry cook. ask squidward, he'll vouch for me. did you order twenty cases of... ripped pants?! how 'bout some soup on your best day ever? i'm cheating, mrs. puff! i'm cheating!.