Yoga Truths Ipsum

Yoga is for people that want to have sex fuck yoga soft music yoga is gay. fuck yoga this is our next pose... fuck that, i'm going across the street for a drink. my dream is to open my own yoga studio. yes, while some men do yoga, the "exercise" is marketed to women as a way to stay skinny without getting sweaty. the color of yoga is plum. yoga "gear and apparel" is no longer just for the yoga studio. yogabond: a derogatory term to describe the new urban hipster who practices yoga, and can be seen wandering the city streets with a five buck latte in one hand, phone in the other, and yogamat slung over their shoulder. i am a yoga goddess. dear yoga goddess: if you ever find a guy willing to put up with your ponderous, boner-killing, fun-destroying attitude then i'll believe that chickens have teeth. my yoga mat cost more than your yoga mat this one bitch yoga instructor kept yelling, "suck in your core! suck it in!" and i was like -- bitch, i can hear you but i'm pregnant. are yoga pants really pants? come on. the yoga pant phenomenon worries me. a lot. it's like wearing pantyhose and nothing else in public..

Going to be a yoga practitioner dreadlocks i only started yoga because it is trendy got my hood pierced wearing yoga tattoos attracts the boys see you at yoga i''m doing a vinegar and honey cleanse this week patagonia fuck yoga my dream is to open my own yoga studio. yoga is the greatest fraud ever perpetuated against american women for the sake of vanity if you don't count the ones that killed or maimed them. yes, while some men do yoga, the "exercise" is marketed to women as a way to stay skinny without getting sweaty. yoga is fake exercise. omg, did you see the latest athleta catalog??? yoga floss: outfits and accessories that typically adorn trophy wives, cougars, and ex-wives who have fucked over their ex-husbands at the yoga studio. fake yoga: the act of using yoga for self-aggrandisement, to define personal style or to make money in the yoga business. yunt: a yoga cunt. particularly the yoga studio receptionists. like all people who end up on yoga's door step as teachers and their helpers, they are lost, ill defined, failed at all other endeavors and angry. their response is yuntish behavior. frequently yunts date beanie boys. bikram vagina: term used to coin when a woman consistently has a hot and sweaty vagina, comparable to how it feels inside of a bikram yoga studio. close your eyes. if you can still see me, it could be a sign that your eyes are still open. yoga is great for my bi-curious side that surfaced after my third divorce. a yoga goddess? a "yogurt goddess" sounds more like a lonely, pretentious, scared little girl who separates herself from the world and other people so she doesn't get hurt. or just someone with autism. yoga is made out of lies about how you are changing the world by raising your leg up like a urinating dog. are yoga pants really pants? come on. i can agree that yoga pants are comfortable, but that is no reason to wear them in public. yoga pants are the wonder-bra for the ass but they ruin the mystery. believe it or not, the same pair of yoga pants garnered me three very profitable marriages. how do you think i afford this house on the river? yoga pants are way too sheer to wear in public without a skirt or a long top. they advocate misogyny and statutory rape..

Taking my yoga instructor class going to be a yoga practitioner being a yoga practitioner fools people into thinking i am calm wooden earrings in my stretched ears i only drink organic tea patagonia i prefer to dress up in fancy clothes and pay someone to watch me stretch yes, while some men do yoga, the "exercise" is marketed to women as a way to stay skinny without getting sweaty. yoga is fake exercise. guerilla yoga: to participate in yoga outside a studio, home or private place. to do yoga in public settings, ie. a park, mall, school, boardwalk aka super lame. yiilf: acronym for "yoga instructor i'd like to fuck"; an endearing or confessional term used by yoga students in private reference to their hot and/or enchanting yoga class instructor. all female yoga students dream of someday being considered a yiilf by all of the women and men in their class. i am a yoga goddess. i've never met a yoga goddess who wasn't a first-class, ego-tripping narcissist largely out of touch with her own deeper nature; though that's often defensively disguised through all sorts of self-referential "discourse." fellow girls - yoga pants are not pants. please, for the love of all of us who don't want to see your junk in explicit detail at any given moment, wear something else..