Yoga Truths Ipsum

Wooden earrings in my stretched ears patagonia made my mantra patagonia spirit see you at yoga if you don''t stretch you will die soft music hey i teach teach yoga on my back deck after the community dinner. self-righteous spiritual types i do yoga so i am better than you. the color of yoga is plum. yogabond: a derogatory term to describe the new urban hipster who practices yoga, and can be seen wandering the city streets with a five buck latte in one hand, phone in the other, and yogamat slung over their shoulder. my girl's pussy is always so wet and warm, she must have bikram vagina. after i started doing yoga, i changed the way i talk to a soft fake whisper i am a yoga goddess. my husband had an affair with a yoga goddess. bad karma. i've never met a yoga goddess who wasn't a first-class, ego-tripping narcissist largely out of touch with her own deeper nature; though that's often defensively disguised through all sorts of self-referential "discourse." fellow girls - yoga pants are not pants. please, for the love of all of us who don't want to see your junk in explicit detail at any given moment, wear something else. yoga pants are the wonder-bra for the ass but they ruin the mystery. yoga pants are way too sheer to wear in public without a skirt or a long top. they advocate misogyny and statutory rape..

Dreadlocks patagonia spirit i am reconnecting with my inner self i only do yoga so i can get away wearing my tank top and low cut stretch pants all the time. how else would i show off my over-sized ass-cheek/hip/thigh tattoo to attract my next husband? fuck yoga omg, did you see the latest athleta catalog??? guerilla yoga: to participate in yoga outside a studio, home or private place. to do yoga in public settings, ie. a park, mall, school, boardwalk aka super lame. after i started doing yoga, i changed the way i talk to a soft fake whisper i like men to know that i do yoga, because knowing i can bend really well means i'm awesome in bed. yoga is great for my bi-curious side that surfaced after my third divorce. i've never met a yoga goddess who wasn't a first-class, ego-tripping narcissist largely out of touch with her own deeper nature; though that's often defensively disguised through all sorts of self-referential "discourse." indulgence is what the yoga goddess seeks more than anything else - from her man, and from the world. yoga is made out of lies about how you are changing the world by raising your leg up like a urinating dog. i can agree that yoga pants are comfortable, but that is no reason to wear them in public. yoga pants are the wonder-bra for the ass but they ruin the mystery..

Patagonia made my mantra bikram vagina: term used to coin when a woman consistently has a hot and sweaty vagina, comparable to how it feels inside of a bikram yoga studio. i am a yoga goddess. i've never met a yoga goddess who wasn't a first-class, ego-tripping narcissist largely out of touch with her own deeper nature; though that's often defensively disguised through all sorts of self-referential "discourse." oh...yawn... i will be glad when the yoga backlash hits. and i don't have to see anymore outdoor yoga pose profile pics. you describe the beast (yoga goddess) reasonably well from within her own "orbit." they are amusing and worth a few days or weeks in bed - at most. there are so many fine cultured women in this world - and very few of them practice, let alone teach, yoga! most yoga goddesses desperately need to stop practicing yoga, work overseas in some humble non-yogic capacity -- maybe go back to school and then return stronger and more genuinely wise. the yoga pant phenomenon worries me. a lot. it's like wearing pantyhose and nothing else in public..